Recipes What I Have Cooked and Then Ate - Thaichinamese Salmon

Thaichinamese Salmon

I actually did this photopicture! I used my potato.

This meal is nutritio-licious. That's a word what I made up just for this dish. It is a sort of panfried, pan-Southeast-Asian fish dish.

What You Put In It

Salmon fillets (1 big one or 2 smalls - I use frozen as they can do less brutal to the money)

1 shallot, chopped fine

2 cloves of garlic, cored and chopped fine

1/2 a red bell pepper, in short thin slices

1 large red chili-pepper, de-seeded (if you don't de-seed it, you might have to shoot yourself)

Fresh ginger (a good knob of, sliced thin)

Fresh coriander (to taste)

Olive oil (a few teaspoons of)

Garam Masala powder (a few shakes of)

1/4 pint of Milk (from a coconut or from a cow)

How You Do The Food (serves 1 - use more of everything to feed more people)

Put the olive oil in the pan and make it warm. Turn on a middle-heat, olive oil doesn't like hot heat.

Put in the chopped garlic, shallot, chili and fresh ginger, and give it a bit of sizzle time. You don't want it to go brown though.

Put in salmon and swish it about in the juices and bits. Straight away, add the sliced red bell pepper. Sprinkle the garam masala on top. If you can't find garam masala, look for coriander powder and cardamon pods.

Fish is well easy to cook. Basically, as soon as it be more than a bit warm, it's cooked. Give it a few minutes on both sides, don't be a wet-molly.

Pour in the milk. Coconut milk be more proper like, but the stuff that you squeeze out of cows will do the job. Turn the heat low, you don't want to boil the milk. Or maybe you do, but that would make you a dick with no morals. Basically a kitten-killer. Don't boil the milk, alright?

Chuck in roughly a third of your fresh coriander, recklessly chopped.

Give it another few minutes until all the face-smacking luvverly flavours are making the milk pregnant with the yums.

Read that sentence again, it's worth it.

Take off the heat and pretend you're in one of them subtitled martial-arts films for a few seconds. Make strange faces. Punch the air and pretend you're six.


Serve in a bowl, more fresh coriander on top. This time, chop it with debonair flair. A squeeze of lime juice is an optional extra.

Drink something alcoholic and refreshing with it. I like Hooch at the moment. It's lemony.


Suggested watching material: Jackie Chan films. Films what have Takeshi Kaneshiro in (he's part Taiwanese and all hunk). Good Morning Vietnam!

Yarg.

A blog about one of my favourite cheeses.

Praise Cheeses!

The yarg cheese is one of my faves cos it is a little bit odd, like myself. You get the impression that the yarg could be that one at the party what sits in the corner talking to the host's cat, wearing a wooly jumper that will be hipster fashion in a few months but isn't yet.

Yarg is wrapped in nettles. They can't sting you though, cos they've gone all mouldy and delicious! I eat the nettles - some don't, but this is a case where the rind is edible, so it's up to you.

Yarg is Cornish. That is, the cheese is Cornish. It ain't some Cornish word dredged up from the misty past of Cornwall where they all wore paint and did naked stuff at Romans. It's not an ancient dialect word or nothing.

It's just "Gray" backwards. Yarg was made up by Allan and Jenny Gray, which makes them Dairy Heroes, God Bless Them, and may their cheeseboard forever be stocked and their fridge have jam in it. Like a lot of very awesome stuff, Yarg is from the Nineteen-Seventies. Eat Yarg while listening to Led Zeppelin's later stuff, or The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders From Mars what is by David Bowie.

Yarg almost makes up for the Vietnam war but not quite.

 Above is a picture of Yarg. I did not take the picture. If you did, thank you for taking the picture, may I please keep showing it to the internet people? Otherwise I will be sad, but I will take it down.

The Important Bit

The taste! What does the yarg taste like, I hear you ask? (I don't really, as you're on the internet and I'm not psychic, I'm just being conversational and friendly, to give the illusion that what we is having here is dialogue, rather than the inept ravings of a cheese-loving lunatic with issues.)

Yarg tastes lovely and characterful, with a creamy, nutty flavour, especially where it is soft near the rind, and an undercurrent of tang. The centre of the cheese is like Caerphilly a bit, in that it is dryer and crumbly. It's sweet tangy nutty creamy and most of all I'd call it balanced. It is like the high-rope-walker of the cheese world. Very easy for a cheese-novice to eat and enjoy, even if the nettles seem a bit intimidating at first.

Eat some, cheese-bitches!